What Is This Thing Called Love?


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1. In Scott and Wilson’s apartment

Wilson was uneasy. He was at a point in his life where he should be happier than he had ever been, and yet he had his doubts. He was an attorney with a growing reputation, and many people paid top dollar for his representation and counsel. For the past six months he had been living with his lover Scott. Scott was yet to be discovered artist and photographer who was so handsome that he was able to support himself quite nicely working as a model until his discovery as the great artist he thought himself to be.

Scott had just signed a huge contract with the firm of McTate and Mann to appear in a new series of commercials for the "ADAYNO HUNK" line of men's erotic underwear. He would be modeling the second most popular line of articles that ADAYNO HUNK had to offer. He would be the second star behind Byron, the world's most famous and gorgeous male model, and Wilson had negotiated his lover's contract, seeing to it that Scott would receive top dollar for his work in print ads.

And despite the fact that all seemed wonderful on the surface, something was eating at him.

"What's wrong?" Scott asked. "You've hardly touched your breakfast, and you tossed and turned all night."

"I don't know," Wilson lied. "I'm just out of sorts, I guess."

"I think you just need a good dose of lovemaking," Scott joked.

With that, he took the pepper shaker off the table and poured a bit into his hand. He then took a deep sniff of the magic black powder.

"Sniff... phew. I think y- you-you’re…sniff… Going to feel bet- bett- better real-… Huhh… Huuhhhh… Soon!"

With that said, Scott's perfect nose reddened to capacity. He took in three huge breaths and then exploded


Each sneeze was giving Scott a progressively harder erection. He then proceeded to rub himself up against Wilson to seduce him.

"Come on, Willy… sniff!" Scott groaned. "Let's not- sniff- wa- wuh-waste… sniff… this- sniff… stiffy! SHOOOOOO!"

With each sneeze, Scott's beautiful long blond hair flew over his shoulders and into his face. He would then shake or flick his head to draw his hair back into its original position.

As uneasy as Wilson was, he was only human and could not resist the sight of his blonde Apollo sneezing his gorgeous head off… and giving himself an erection to boot. In spite of himself, Wilson took Scott and had wild sex with him.

"That was fantastic," Scott said after they had finished.

"I guess so," Wilson retorted.

"You ‘guess so’? What do you mean? Wasn't it wonderful for you too?"  Scott was obviously hurt by his lover’s offhandedness.

"Scotty, we have to talk. Will you be home tonight or are you working late at the shoot?"

"Let's talk now. What's on your mind?"

"I'd really rather talk tonight."

"I'm here now. Start talking!” Scott demanded, taking on a brook no nonsense expression.

"Okay then, if you insist. Scotty I... er.. what it is... um..."

"Willy, just spit it out! What are you trying to say?"

"Scotty, I don't know where this relationship is going. I mean, God knows I love you with every atom in my body. It's just that I don't know about you. I mean, it's you and this sneezing thing. How do I know whether you really love me, or whether you're just in love with some putz who makes you sneeze whenever you want to. What I'm trying to say is, I need to know if it's really me you love, or whether it’s the sneezes.

“Basically, I need time Scott. I need to sort things out in my head."

"Are you saying you want to break up?" Scott asked, his big, beautiful eyes brimming with tears. "But Willy... I love you!"

"I wish I could know that for sure, Scott."

"I LOVE YOU!" Scott screamed at Wilson.

"And I love you, Scott," said Wilson rather vaguely as he left and closed the door behind him.


2. Later that morning, in court

"Brilliant case, councilor," Andres said as he extended his hand to his opposing counsel. "That had to be the finest piece of lawyering I've ever seen."

"Thank you," answered Wilson. "Your presentation was masterful as well, councilor!"

"Of course, you know I'll beat you on appeal," Andres said, smiling.

"We’ll see, won't we? In any event, that won't be for another year at least," Wilson shrugged. "In the meantime, do you have plans for lunch?"

"No, I don't," Andres answered.

"In that case, would you like to join me for lunch?"

"Sounds wonderful, councilor."

"Splendid!” Wilson said.

Within minutes, the two men had made their way to a nearby restaurant.

"You know, Andres, I'm sorry I never kept in touch with you after we graduated law school. I always liked you. I want you to know that."

"Councilor... you didn't invite me to lunch after all these years to apologize for losing touch with me, did you?"

"No, Andres, I didn't. In all honesty, I asked you here to ask you a question. May I ask you a question?"

"By all means."

Wilson took a deep breath and proceeded.

"Andres, I was just wondering... er... I mean... er... with your looks and what... er... how do you... I mean....er... Oh Hell!”  Wilson finally decided to just get it over with, and blurted out the question. “Andres, have you ever been in love?"

"Oh boy, have I! I'm crazy in love right now, as a matter of fact."

"How wonderful for you," Wilson said. "But the point of my question is this- and please don't be offended by what I ask- but with your looks and all, how do you know if your lover actually… well, loves you or just your looks? How do you know if he loves the real you? I guess what I'm asking is, how can you tell if someone truly loves you?"

Andres took a deep breath and puffed his cheeks out as he exhaled.

"That's some question," Andres said. "Let's see… With my Sheldon, there are so many ways in which I know he loves me. But most of all I think it's the way he loves me- do you know what I mean? I can just tell, from the way he makes love to me, that he adores every fiber of my being. I know it sounds crazy, but it's true. Nobody has ever made love to me the way Sheldon has. I know that's a highly subjective answer- hey, it wouldn’t stand up in court,- but it's the truth. You have to find your own way of knowing that your man loves you."

Wilson was pensive. He mulled that over for a bit, and then his eyes grew moist as he looked at Andres.

"I think I blew it big time with Scott. That's my lover’s name. He's wonderful, you know. He's handsome and sexy and smart and funny…. He's going to be a famous artist some day. He's loving, but he’s infuriating at times too. Oh Andres, I hope it's not too late for us, but I just wish I could tell for sure whether it's me he loves or..." Wilson stopped himself just in time, the word ‘sneezes’ poised precariously on the tip of his tongue.

"Or... what?" Andres asked.

"Oh... nothing. Just thinking out loud," Wilson said. "Hmm, we'd better be getting back to court. We don't want to keep old judge Kingsfield waiting now, do we?"

"Perish the thought!" Andres joked back as the two friends left the restaurant and started back towards the courthouse.

They were just about to enter the courthouse when Wilson and Andres saw a crowd of people looking up at the sky. Intrigued, they both glanced up, and then saw what had drawn the crowd’s attention- up in the brilliant blue sky, a skywriter was looping about in a small aircraft, writing a message.

"Look at that," Andres said as he pointed up into the sky.

Wilson looked up and read the message being written for all the world to see:


"What the hell does that mean?" Andres wondered out loud.

"It means that some insane idiot is in love with me," answered Wilson with a big smile on his face. "Andres, would you please make my apologies to the court? Tell them I've suddenly been taken ill and had to go home for the day.”

"Sure thing," Andres said, winking at his old friend.


3. Back in Scott and Wilson's apartment

Wilson entered the apartment casually, pretending to be completely unaware of Scott’s skywriting exploits.

Scott, standing by the couch, was holding his breath. "Anything interesting happen at court today, Willy?" he asked his lover as nonchalantly as possible.

He was on pins and needles. He wasn't at all sure Wilson had seen the message in the sky – nothing in his lover’s stiff demeanor suggested he had, anyway. He was just coming in, putting aside his briefcase and loosening his tie as he would have on any other day.

"Nothing out of the ordinary," Wilson replied. "I won my case, had lunch with an old friend of mine, and oh yeah! I and saw some nut skywriting messages in the sky!"

With that, Wilson came near Scott, hand outstretched. "How many times must I tell you that I like your gorgeous hair to hang loosely over your shoulders and you shouldn’t pull it back in a ponytail?"

Wilson untied Scott's ponytail and draped his hair loosely about his shoulders. He then lifted Scott’s chin and proceeded to kiss his handsome blonde Apollo.

"Now do you realize how much I love you?" Scott asked between kisses.

"Do you realize how much of an ass I've been?” Wilson said, answering his lover’s question with one of his own.

"So.... where do we go from here?" Scott asked.

"We go here, and do this!" Wilson said as he took some of Scott's beautiful long blond hair and began tickling Scott's nose with it.

"Oh no, don’t do that!” Scott playfully protested. "You're going to- huuuh- make me- me--mmmmeeee snee… huuuuuh… sneeze! Sniff!”

Scott worked at holding his sneezes in as long as he could. The harder he fought, the harder his erection grew, and the more delighted Wilson became. At last, poor Scott’s upturned nose could stand it no longer, and he exploded,


Wilson picked Scott up and carried him to their bedroom. They made love as if for the first time, and indeed it was a first time of sorts, because now Wilson took special notice of the way Scott made love to him. Sweet, tender, passionate but playful- it was fulfilling, and wonderful. There was no mistaking it - Scott did, indeed, love him.